Mind Shart

"Every living thing is, from the cosmic perspective, incredibly lucky simply to be alive."

Fri, 29 Mar 2013 03:51:41 -0400

“Every living thing is, from the cosmic perspective, incredibly lucky simply to be alive.”

- Dan Dennett, born March 28, 1942. (via explore-blog)

nickkroll: two of my favorite women…

Tue, 26 Mar 2013 12:51:25 -0400

nickkroll:

two of my favorite women…

explore-blog: Viktor Frankl, born on this day in 1905, on the...

Tue, 26 Mar 2013 12:41:14 -0400

explore-blog:

Viktor Frankl, born on this day in 1905, on the search for meaning.

hilarioushumorfromouterspace: Stay away from this blog if you...

Tue, 11 Dec 2012 14:57:29 -0500

hilarioushumorfromouterspace:

Stay away from this blog if you hate laughing!

hilarioushumorfromouterspace: Stay away from this blog if you...

Sat, 09 Jun 2012 12:41:07 -0400

hilarioushumorfromouterspace:

Stay away from this blog if you hate laughing!

hilarioushumorfromouterspace: Stay away from this blog if you...

Mon, 21 May 2012 13:54:20 -0400

hilarioushumorfromouterspace:

Stay away from this blog if you hate laughing!

hilarioushumorfromouterspace: Stay away from this blog if you...

Wed, 16 May 2012 02:01:08 -0400

hilarioushumorfromouterspace:

Stay away from this blog if you hate laughing!

I work for a very chick-friendly company. So friendly in fact, that the majority of the team can...

Thu, 10 May 2012 16:48:00 -0400

I work for a very chick-friendly company. So friendly in fact, that the majority of the team can boast of not just one, but two X chromosomes - an anomaly in the industry.

As so many colleagues are kicking it up in the Land of Milk and Mummy right now, management keeps an ever paranoid eye over the rest of us fecund beauties for any signs of the ubiquitous baby bump. So, I’ve compiled a list of best practices to get them to chill out and focus on something other than the state of our ovaries, like my bottom line.

Here goes :

1) Blame disproportionate responses on PMS. Poor boys will redden up like a soaked tampon when you mention anything related to “The Cycle”.

2) Overdose on caffeine - mainly, because you can. ODing on anything while pregnant is generally considered a major no no.

3) Get sloshed at the office Q2 Results Party. Seriously, it’s the only reason I drink.

And just cuz messing with their minds is so easy, every other month whip out a box of delicious Earth Mama Angel Baby’s Organic Milkmaid Tea.

Nothing beats indulging in mental calorie bombs and deep frying my brain in trans cultural fat....

Wed, 09 May 2012 16:54:00 -0400

Nothing beats indulging in mental calorie bombs and deep frying my brain in trans cultural fat. Today I managed to scrape “From Prada to Nada” from the bottom of the Apple TV barrel.

I hoped that like every other adaptation of a Jane Austen novel (e.g. Clueless), it would be an improvement on the original. Like Clueless, it takes place in Los Angeles. Unlike Clueless, our protagonists - Nora and Mary - don’t get to mmmbop around the Hills for long-their dad dies, they find out he was broke, ergo they are now broke and have nowhere to live. So Nora and Mary move out of their palatial home in 90210 and move in with their auntie in little Mexico aka East LA (think Fresh Prince, now flip it and reverse it). Apparently, exposure to poverty and family gives them an opportunity to blossom as young adults; embracing their Mexican identity and err…men. That’s if you read the sales pitch instead of watching the movie.

Given cultural pride is one of the main themes of “From Prada to Nada”, casting two white actresses spray painted with radioactive sludge to represent American-Mexicans seemed a tad tasteless. I should’ve known that when Camilla Belle flashed on the screen looking like the real life incarnation of Lisa Simpson that something was a miss in East LA.

So yeah, aside from competing with Tan Mom (the inspiration behind Tanorexic doll!) in the toasted department there’s Nada noteworthy about this movie.

From this:

To this:

To this?

The Grapes of Wrath

Tue, 17 Apr 2012 17:35:51 -0400

The Grapes of Wrath

Memoir

Mon, 16 Apr 2012 16:38:00 -0400

M: I’m trying out titles for my book. Thinking of “Beat the House”

S: Sounds like the sequel to Oceans 13 with Eddie Murphy starring in all the roles

M: I’d watch that movie

Tina Fey

Mon, 16 Apr 2012 15:42:00 -0400

Is like the George Bush of comedians; she’s the one you’d rather have a beer with.

On the institution of marriage

Mon, 16 Apr 2012 15:36:00 -0400

There’s a reason they call it an institution. It’s only for crazy people

Being disappointed

Mon, 16 Apr 2012 15:35:00 -0400

Kindle was like the chick you took out on an expensive date and spent the rest of the night wiping the trickle of vomit hanging off her chin as she hugged the toilet to sleep.

Your frenemy's blog

Mon, 16 Apr 2012 15:30:00 -0400

M: So you’ve never seen her website?!

OMG!

J is obsessed with it

actually it’s kind of…fascinating.

you know how something can be so boring/dull/mundane that it kind of takes on a certain fascinating quality?

S: In what way?

M: So you keep waiting for the punchline

S: …

M: It’s like a non-satirical satire.